How to Heal Anxiety and Emotional Wounds with Ryan Weiss
Understanding the Two Wolves: Fear vs. Love
Have you ever felt like you’re constantly battling between fear and love? Life coach Ryan Weiss shares a powerful Cherokee teaching: “Two wolves stand on your shoulders. One is fear, the other is love. The one who wins is the one you feed.” This profound insight sets the foundation for Weiss’s approach to emotional healing and self-awareness.
In a conversation with Heal Squad with Maria Menounos, Weiss, a former Broadway performer and talent agent, opens up about how his own struggles led him to discover a path of self-care and deep emotional work. Now, he helps thousands through his Waking Up with Ryan daily email and his Sanctuary Challenge, guiding people to cultivate a life of mindfulness, self-compassion, and healing.
Why Fear Dominates Our Lives
According to Weiss, we are born absorbing the fears of those around us—our parents, society, the economy. From an early age, we learn to prioritize success, productivity, and external validation over emotional well-being. This fuels our inner “fear wolf,” which breeds anxiety, self-doubt, and emotional avoidance.
“We learn to suppress our emotions because we fear that if we express our pain, sadness, or anger, we won’t be loved,” Weiss explains. This emotional repression can manifest in anxiety, depression, and even physical illness.
The Root of Anxiety: Avoiding Our Feelings
Weiss challenges the common understanding of anxiety, stating, “Anxiety is not a feeling. It’s what happens in the body when we don’t feel.” He describes how emotions build up like a pressure cooker, and when we suppress them, tension forms—leading to overwhelming stress and eventual breakdowns.
Instead of numbing our emotions with distractions like work, social media, or even positive affirmations, Weiss suggests a different approach: allowing emotions to exist without judgment and creating a safe space to process them.
How to Heal: The Three-Step Process
Healing, according to Weiss, requires three essential steps:
- Feel the Emotion: Recognize when you are feeling discomfort instead of pushing it away. “Our knee-jerk reaction is to avoid emotions. Instead, ask yourself: What am I really feeling right now?”
- Validate Your Experience: Allow yourself to acknowledge your emotions as real and valid. “Most of us grew up believing we should only express ‘good’ emotions, but true healing happens when we make space for all of them.”
- Meet Your Own Needs: Identify the deeper need behind the emotion—whether it’s safety, love, or connection—and find ways to provide it for yourself.
The Power of Self-Care Practices
Weiss emphasizes the importance of daily self-care rituals to slow down and reconnect with ourselves. His Sanctuary Challenge promotes five daily self-care habits:
- 20-minute guided meditation to check in with emotions
- 30 minutes of movement (walking, yoga, or exercise)
- Healthy eating by consuming more natural, earth-based foods
- ‘Goddess time’ (relaxation ritual) like taking a bath or turning off screens
- 8 hours of sleep to allow for emotional and physical restoration
“Slowing down allows us to reconnect with the rhythm of life,” Weiss says. “Healing is closer to us than our very breath—we just need to create space to receive it.”
Healing Trauma by Reparenting Yourself
One of Weiss’s most transformative teachings involves “reparenting” your inner child. Many of us developed survival mechanisms in childhood that helped us cope but no longer serve us as adults.
“We must become the loving, nurturing presence that we didn’t have growing up,” he explains. “By going back to that younger version of ourselves and providing comfort, we rewrite the narrative.”
Through guided exercises, deep self-reflection, and self-compassion, Weiss helps individuals heal past wounds by offering their younger selves the love, validation, and care they always needed.
Creating a Safe Space for Others
For those supporting loved ones struggling with anxiety, Weiss stresses the importance of holding space rather than trying to fix or dismiss their emotions.
“When someone is in emotional distress, they don’t need quick fixes or advice. They need to feel heard and validated,” he says. “By simply listening and acknowledging their pain, we create a safe space for healing.”
Final Thoughts
Ryan Weiss’s teachings remind us that true healing doesn’t come from outside sources—it begins within. By slowing down, honoring our emotions, and meeting our own needs, we can rewrite our inner narratives and cultivate a life of love rather than fear.
For more healing and wellness tips, be sure to subscribe to the Heal Squad with Maria Menounos podcast via YouTube or Apple Podcasts.
