What Are You Working Toward?

We spend so much time asking ourselves what we need to do.

What do I need to finish today?

What do I need to accomplish this week?

What do I need to fix?

Who do I need to call?

What do I need to earn?

What’s next?

But Yogi Cameron asks a much bigger question:

What am I working toward?

Because those are two very different things.

You can be incredibly productive and still be moving in a direction you never consciously chose.

You can answer every email, make every meeting, hit every deadline, take care of everyone around you—and one day realize you’ve become really good at living a life that’s exhausting you.

That’s the conversation Maria Menounos has with Yogi Cameron and Yogini Jaima, and it starts with something most of us know all too well: we’re running.

And running.

And running.

The question is whether we ever stopped to decide where we’re running to.

You Can’t Run the Sprint and the Marathon at the Same Time

One of Cameron’s best analogies in the conversation is simple:

You can’t run the 100 meters and the marathon at the same time.

But that’s exactly how many of us try to live.

We want the career.

The money.

The family.

The social life.

The house.

The experiences.

The perfect body.

The side hustle.

The relationships.

The travel.

And somehow we’re also supposed to sleep eight hours, meditate, exercise, eat perfectly, reduce stress and “find balance.”

So we try to do all of it.

And when we can’t, health is often the thing that gets pushed down the list.

I’ll sleep later.

I’ll start exercising next month.

I’ll eat better when work settles down.

I’ll deal with the stress after this project.

I’ll take care of myself when I have more time.

Except there’s always another project.

The Habits You Can Get Away With Today May Become the Life You’re Stuck With Tomorrow

During the conversation, a 21-year-old member of Maria’s team walks in carrying two lattes and a matcha—all for herself.

Why?

She’s exhausted.

She’s staying up until midnight or 1 a.m., waking up tired and using caffeine to get herself through the day.

And Cameron points out something important.

At 21, you may be able to sustain it.

The danger is that you practice it.

Stay up late.

Wake up exhausted.

Drink more caffeine.

Push through.

Repeat.

Eventually, the temporary solution becomes the routine.

And the routine becomes your normal.

That’s bigger than coffee.

Think about how many things in our lives started as temporary.

I’ll just do this until things calm down.

I’ll work weekends until we get through this.

I’ll skip the gym this week.

I’ll eat whatever’s easiest right now.

I’ll deal with this later.

Then somehow “later” becomes five years.

Cameron’s warning isn’t simply that unhealthy choices have consequences. It’s that what you repeatedly do becomes increasingly difficult to stop doing.

We Treat Health Like It’s Guaranteed

Maria admits something during the conversation that’s incredibly revealing.

When she prays, she thinks about her work.

Her family.

Her friends.

Her goals.

Her future.

And then she remembers:

Oh yeah. My health.

It’s funny because it’s painfully familiar.

We behave as though health is the one thing we’re automatically entitled to have while we pursue everything else.

Until something happens.

Suddenly, nothing else matters.

The promotion doesn’t matter when you’re sitting in a doctor’s office waiting for results.

The overflowing inbox doesn’t seem quite as important when someone you love gets sick.

The house, car, followers and bank account don’t mean much when you don’t feel well enough to enjoy any of them.

And yet when we’re healthy, it’s incredibly easy to put health last.

Cameron’s suggestion is to reverse the equation:

Put health at the top, and organize everything else underneath it.

Maybe You Don’t Need to Add Something. Maybe You Need to Remove Something.

There’s another theme running through this conversation that I love:

Simplify.

Our instinct when life isn’t working is often to add something.

A supplement.

An app.

A productivity system.

Another expert.

Another podcast.

Another morning routine.

Another solution.

Maria talks about getting rid of possessions and responsibilities and uses a great phrase:

“Simplifying to amplify.”

That’s worth thinking about.

Maybe the solution to feeling overwhelmed isn’t becoming better at managing 47 things.

Maybe it’s having 32 things.

Maybe the question isn’t:

How can I fit more into my life?

Maybe it’s:

What no longer needs to be in my life at all?

A commitment you don’t care about.

Something you’re maintaining because you’ve always maintained it.

A relationship that consumes far more than it gives.

A possession that requires constant attention.

A responsibility you accepted years ago that no longer fits the person you are today.

Sometimes simplifying isn’t giving something up.

It’s getting your attention back.

Separate the Problem From the Story You’re Telling Yourself About the Problem

The conversation gets especially useful when Maria talks about catastrophizing.

Something goes wrong and the mind doesn’t stop at what happened.

It races ahead.

What if this gets worse?

What if I can’t fix it?

What if I lose everything?

What if this never gets better?

Suddenly we’re no longer responding only to reality.

We’re responding to the disaster movie playing in our head.

Yogini Jaima suggests separating the two:

What is actually happening?

And:

What am I imagining could happen?

That’s an incredibly practical distinction.

Maybe there really is a financial problem.

Okay.

What are the numbers?

What bills need to be paid?

What can be reduced?

What action can you take today?

Maybe there really is a health issue.

Okay.

What symptoms are actually occurring?

What has the doctor said?

What information do you need?

What’s your next step?

Deal with the reality.

Not the ten imaginary realities your brain created around it.

Stress Isn’t Always the Enemy

Yogini offers another analogy that’s worth remembering.

Think about a bow and arrow.

Without tension, the arrow goes nowhere.

But pull the string too far and eventually something breaks.

That’s stress.

We often fantasize about eliminating stress completely.

But some tension moves us.

Deadlines can focus us.

Challenges can strengthen us.

Responsibility can give us purpose.

The goal isn’t necessarily a life without stress.

It’s recognizing when the tension has gone from propelling you forward to pulling you apart.

And that requires paying attention to yourself.

You Control Less Than You Think—and More Than You Realize

Perhaps the most freeing part of the conversation comes when Cameron talks about control.

We can’t control the universe.

We can’t control what other people do.

We can’t know exactly what will happen next.

There will always be uncertainty.

But there are things we control.

What time you go to bed.

What you eat for breakfast.

Whether you exercise.

Whether you reach for the third coffee.

Whether you spend another hour scrolling.

Whether you say yes.

Whether you say no.

Whether you keep adding things to an already overloaded life.

Whether you give yourself 17 minutes to be quiet.

The mystery of life remains.

Your next action is still yours.

So What Are You Working Toward?

That’s the question I kept coming back to from this conversation.

Because “success” isn’t specific enough.

Neither is “happiness.”

What are you actually building?

And does the way you’re living today support it?

If you’re working toward a great career but destroying your health to get there, is that success?

If you’re working toward financial freedom but accumulating possessions that require more money, time and attention, are you becoming freer?

If you’re working toward happiness but packing every available minute with obligations, when exactly are you supposed to experience it?

If you’re working toward better relationships but you’re too exhausted and distracted to be present with the people you love, what’s the destination?

There may be nothing wrong with the goal.

The route may be the problem.

Start With One Thing

Toward the end of the conversation, Maria makes another important point.

Trying to overhaul everything usually leads to changing nothing.

So don’t.

Pick one thing.

Maybe tonight you turn the television off an hour earlier.

Maybe tomorrow you drink one less coffee.

Maybe you take a walk.

Maybe you remove one obligation from your calendar.

Maybe you spend 10 minutes doing absolutely nothing.

Maybe you finally make the doctor’s appointment you’ve been postponing.

Maybe you stop reaching for another supplement and start asking what’s creating the problem in the first place.

Maybe you simply sit down and answer the question:

What am I working toward?

Then look at your average Tuesday.

Not your vision board.

Not your New Year’s resolutions.

Not the person you intend to become someday.

Your actual life.

Because your calendar, habits and choices may reveal what you’re really working toward far more accurately than your goals do.

And if you don’t like the answer, that’s okay.

You don’t have to rebuild your entire life tomorrow.

Just change the direction a little.

Because eventually, enough small choices in a new direction become a very different destination.